One of my pet peeves is when people “over-meanify” things. What I mean by that is when something happens, for some people there’s always a deep inner child root issue to why I responded the way I did in a moment. Or the reason I chose those particular pair of jeans at that random moment is because I’m healing my past deprived adolescent. 

Sometimes there are deep inner-child level reasons for why I behave the way I do or choose one thing over another. And, sometimes the reason is much simpler: because I wanted to and it would bring me joy or delight in a moment. 

Today’s blog post is related to this conversation.

How to come back to our 2024 habits and rhythms.

As each of us planned out our 2024 year, we set goals and mapped out rhythms or habits we wanted to hold to. Usually at this point of the year though, those rhythms and habits are looking far less shiny than they did on January 1st. It’s not uncommon to have dropped off of them entirely or be very close to doing so.

Rather than giving ourselves a lecture something akin to “but this is what you wanted so just come on and get it together” (said in the sassiest tone and truly just leads to negative self-talk, a topic for another day); think instead on the why. Why did you or I pick that habit or rhythm? What was the underlying goal, hope or desire behind it? 

Revisiting our why is powerful.

Revisiting our why is much more powerful of a practice because it roots the motivation not in something external, like just getting it done for the sake of getting it done or a performance mentality. Instead it roots the motivation on something internal – the deeper goal, hope or desire.

Which honestly can be rooted even further. I know, I know, my pet peeve is when people over-meanify things, but follow me for a moment.

Oftentimes whatever goals or hopes we hold for a year aren’t just floating ideas we plucked out of thin air. They were rooted in something else. Whether something deep like inner child level deep, or whether related to something that would bring us joy and delight. 

The goals we make for our year often speak to something about our heart and our story. The person we are and the person we are becoming. Our being and becoming. Our story.

Real life examples:

Maybe this still doesn’t fully track with you. Here’s some examples from my personal rhythms and habits and what they’re telling me about, well, me.

Health:

I have a goal to run a half marathon (or some long kind of run, giving myself a range for mental health). Habit wise this looks like tracking my working out and running throughout the month. My half marathon goal wasn’t because I saw a reel of someone doing it and it looked “like fun.” I actually don’t enjoy running (that much).

It’s a goal to run a half marathon because it’ll help grow my relationship with exercise by challenging me to push my body AND rest my body (I’m awful at the latter). It’ll grow my mental endurance and stamina, which I know I’ve struggled with and want to build. 

Summary: This habit of health and it’s rooted 2024 goal of a long run is telling me that in my story I have struggled with mental endurance. But in 2024, I want to grow towards a version of me that is mentally strong. 

Reading:

I want to develop a habit of reading every day. There isn’t a deep internal reason for this. I wasn’t forbidden from reading as a child. I was fortunate enough to visit libraries as a kid and had parents and caretakers who read to me growing up. 

In the the last few years*, I have learned that reading brings me delight and joy. I enjoy growing my understanding of the world and people, and expanding my imagination. I love seeing authors’ creativity and life stories come alive. It brings more creativity into my own life.

Summary: This habit of reading and its rooted 2024 goal of reading daily tells me that I want to invite more joy, delight and creativity into my daily life experience, and thereby personal story.

*side note: I actually started tracking my reading a few years ago as a way to challenge myself to spend less time scrolling on my phone at the end of a day and to pick up a book instead. So even if the habits you’ve set for 2024 haven’t changed since 2020, the goals and “why” they are rooted in can change. Isn’t that cool?

Chinese:

I want to practice Chinese 10 minutes every day, with the goal to develop some language competency by the end of 2024. 

This goal is by far the hardest for me because it has the sharpest learning curve. But it also holds the most importance. As a Chinese American, I actually didn’t learn Chinese growing up. Mostly by my choice. However, my daughter is currently learning it in school. I want to be able to communicate with her (because honestly she says words and I have zero idea what she’s saying). And I want to tap into a part of my heritage that I haven’t been able to before.

Summary: The habit of daily Chinese practice is rooted in the 2024 goal of language competency (even a toddler level) and is rooted in my heritage story.

My last thoughts on why this conversation even matters.

All of these habits and goals of “doing” are actually pointing to something in my being, who I am and my story and who I am becoming and the story unfolding. So what might yours say about you?

As you revisit your 2024 habits and rhythms, and goals and hopes, what might they be pointing to in who you are and your story?**

A few last helpful questions: 

If this train of thought still feels challenging, here are a few other questions you can consider:

• Is my habit/rhythm helping me understand something about myself?
• What am I learning about myself as I work through this habit/rhythm? 
• As I think about the habit/rhythm and its end goal, what thoughts or feelings come to mind?
• What is my motivation for this? 

Cheering you on as you uncover your “why” and may it motivate you towards picking back up for 2024. 

With joy & gratitude,

Val

**For our 2024 Kindred Planner users, flip past your March 31st spread and you’ll find two pages dedicated to you writing this out.

**If you don’t have a way to track your habits/rhythms, check out our 2024 Kindred Planners (70% discounted). Designed with both tracking and planning space and pages for reflection. Or our undated planners with the same tracking and planning space and reflection pages, but without the restriction of dates.