“I continue to wrestle with this idea of being intentional and what it looks like in my life. As much as I want to say that I am a very intentional person with people, time, resources, etc., it is something I continue to struggle with daily. I think it is because it requires me to be present and still.
So, for me, being intentional is being present in the moment and making the most of that day.
In the past two years, I’ve lost my aunt and two of my uncles. One passed away while taking a nap in the car, another fell asleep at night and never woke up, and the other unfortunately took his own life. We always talk about how life is so short and we need to appreciate our love ones while we still can. After my aunt passed away first, I told myself I didn’t want to have those thoughts and regrets anymore. I didn’t want to live life thinking I had an infinite amount of time ahead of me.
So instead, I choose to be present today.
Making every conversation count.
Showing kindness now and not worrying about what I can’t control
Being thankful for another day of life.
It wasn’t until the end of 2018 where I began to seek who I am instead of what I do. The first 26 years of my life, my identity and purpose revolved around what I did. I was defined by my goals and the standards set by society. But it wasn’t until I decided to let go of my dream job, superficial things, certain ideals, certain titles like Reverend, student, girlfriend, where I was able to begin seeking who I am apart from what I did.
I think seeking who you are over what you do requires intentionality. It requires a change in perspective. When your focus is on what you do, you are able to measure certain things as a success or failure, good or bad. But when you are intentionally seeking who you are, there is no such thing as success or failure. Every up and down, twist and turn are all part of the journey of discovery. And even though I have just started this journey, I have come to understand that when you are on this path of self discovery compared to a path of seeking accomplishments, you realize that there is so much more to life and you never stop wondering.”
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